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    Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt, Funny Novelty Tee Gear Idea

    Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt, Funny Novelty Tee Gear Idea

    19.95 $

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    Size guide

    Size guide

    T-SHIRT UNISEX HEAVY COTTON TEE
    MeasurementsSMLXL2XL3XL
    Width, in18.0020.0022.0024.0026.0028.00
    Length, in28.0029.0030.0031.0032.0033.00
    Sleeve length15.1016.5018.0019.5021.0022.40
    Tolerance1.501.501.501.501.501.50
    UNISEX HOODIE
    MeasurementsSMLXL2XL3XL
    Width, in20.0822.0524.0225.9827.9929.92
    Length, in27.1727.9529.1329.9231.1031.89
    Sleeve length33.5034.5035.5036.5037.5038.50
    Tolerance1.501.501.501.501.501.50
    UNISEX CREWNECK SWEATSHIRT
    MeasurementsSMLXL2XL3XL
    Width, in20.0022.0124.0026.0028.0030.00
    Length, in27.0028.0029.0030.0031.0032.00
    Sleeve length33.5034.5035.5036.5037.5038.50
    Tolerance1.501.501.501.501.501.50
    UNISEX JERSEY TANK TOP
    MeasurementsSMLXL2XL
    Width, in18.2320.2422.2424.2526.22
    Length, in26.9727.9928.9830.0030.98
    Arm opening10.1210.7511.6312.5013.37
    Tolerance1.001.001.001.001.00
    Description

    Master the Art of the Double Entendre with the Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt

    Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt, Funny Novelty Tee Gear Idea
    Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt, Funny Novelty Tee Gear Idea

    Humor is often the best way to break the ice, and nothing does it quite like a clever play on words. The Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt is designed for the individual who possesses a sharp wit and a bold personality. This isn’t just a piece of clothing; it is a statement of confidence and a nod to classic farmyard humor blended with a modern, edgy twist. The vibe of this shirt is rooted in the “dad joke” tradition but elevated for a contemporary audience that appreciates a bit of tongue-in-cheek irony. Whether you are a fan of rural life or simply enjoy the shock value of a well-placed double entendre, this shirt captures a sense of playful defiance. It invites a second look, followed by a laugh, making it the perfect conversation starter for anyone who doesn’t take themselves—or life—too seriously.

    When it comes to high-quality apparel, comfort is just as important as the message. This garment is crafted from premium cotton, ensuring a breathable feel that stays comfortable throughout the day. We understand that a favorite tee needs to withstand the test of time, which is why we utilize a soft blend that feels broken-in from the very first wear. The fabric is lightweight enough for summer heat but substantial enough to serve as a reliable base layer during the cooler months. By focusing on high-end construction techniques, we ensure that the seams are durable and the fit remains consistent, wash after wash. You won’t have to worry about the stiff, scratchy feel often associated with budget novelty items; this is a high-grade piece of bold graphic apparel designed for maximum wearability.

    Why This Design Rocks:

    • Timeless Humor: As a funny novelty tee, it utilizes classic wordplay that never goes out of style, ensuring you’ll get laughs for years to come.
    • Vintage Aesthetic: The distressed printing technique gives the shirt a weathered, lived-in look that mirrors the charm of a thrifted vintage find.
    • The Perfect Sarcastic Gift Idea: If you are looking for a sarcastic gift idea for the prankster in your life, this design hits the mark for birthdays, holidays, or “just because” moments.
    • Versatile Social Magnet: This shirt is a natural icebreaker at backyard BBQs, dive bars, or casual get-togethers where a good sense of humor is the guest of honor.

    Styling Tips:

    The beauty of this design lies in its rugged, casual appeal. To lean into the vintage aesthetic, pair it with a set of well-worn denim jeans and leather boots. This creates a balanced look that feels intentional yet relaxed. If you want to take it in a more urban direction, layer it under a dark flannel shirt or a distressed denim jacket to complement the graphic’s weathered texture. For those hot summer days, it works effortlessly with cargo shorts and your favorite pair of sneakers. Because the graphic is the focal point, keep your accessories minimal—let the humor do the heavy lifting. It’s an easy-to-wear piece that bridges the gap between country charm and street-ready sarcasm.

    Ultimately, fashion should be fun, and this Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt embodies that philosophy perfectly. It challenges the mundane and brings a sense of levity to your everyday wardrobe. By combining a soft, high-quality feel with a design that demands attention, we have created a garment that you will reach for time and time again. Whether you are buying it for yourself or as a standout present, the Stop Staring At My Cock Distressed T-Shirt is a must-have for anyone who values a good laugh and a great fit.

    About The Product

    About The Product

    Product Details: Unisex Heavy Cotton Tee

    About The Product

    The Gildan 5000 heavy cotton tee is a dependable classic made for everyday wear and custom printing. Its 100% cotton fabric is tightly knit to give designs sharper detail and long-lasting color. The seamless body eliminates side seams for a smoother fit.

    ⚠️ Note: The White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white due to fabric properties.

    Key Features

    Shoulder Tape
    Stabilizes back seams to prevent stretching.
    No Side Seams
    Tubular knit reduces fabric waste & looks better.
    Ribbed Knit Collar
    Highly elastic collar retains shape without seams.
    Material Composition
    Solid colors: 100% Cotton. Heathers: Poly blends.

    Care Instructions

    • Machine wash: Cold (max 30C or 90F)
    • Tumble dry: Low heat
    • Do not iron; Do not dryclean

    Origin & Safety

    • Made in Nicaragua
    • Meets US/EU safety standards
    • Unisex Sizing (Adult)
    Product Details: Unisex Heavy Blend™ Hoodie

    About The Product

    The Gildan Heavy Blend™ hoodie, made from a soft cotton-poly blend, provides warmth and durability. Its unisex fit offers everyday versatility, with ribbed cuffs and hem to keep the shape intact. A large front pocket adds convenience, while the double-lined hood with matching drawcord gives it a clean, cohesive look. Trusted for custom printing and casual wear.

    ⚠️ Note: Due to fabric properties, the White color variant may appear off-white rather than bright white.

    Key Features

    50% Cotton, 50% Polyester
    Strong, smooth fabric perfect for printing. Heather Sport colors are 40/60 blend.
    Drawstring Hood
    Adjustable double-lined hood with self-colored woven cord.
    Spacious Pockets
    Kangaroo pouch pocket always keeps your hands warm.
    Without Side Seams
    Knitted in one piece using tubular knit, reducing fabric waste.

    Care Instructions

    • Machine wash: Cold (max 30C or 90F)
    • Tumble dry: Medium heat
    • Iron, steam or dry: Low heat
    • Do not dryclean

    Origin & Compliance

    • Made in Bangladesh
    • Meets safety requirements (flammability, lead, etc.)
    • High quality DTG & DTF printing methods
    Product Details: Unisex Heavy Blend™ Crewneck Sweatshirt

    About The Product

    The Gildan 18000 sweatshirt is a unisex heavy blend crewneck made from a 50/50 cotton-polyester fabric, combining softness with lasting durability. Its smooth surface supports crisp, vibrant prints. The ribbed-knit collar and reinforced cuffs help it keep its shape over time. A seamless body design reduces irritation and adds to overall comfort.

    ⚠️ Note:
    – The White color variant may appear off-white due to fabric properties.
    – Subtle orange hue shifts with lighting in the Orange color variant.

    Key Features

    50% Cotton, 50% Polyester
    Heavy blend fabric combines softness with durability.
    Ribbed Knit Collar
    Highly elastic collar helps retain shape, with seam.
    Without Side Seams
    Tubular knit reduces fabric waste & makes garment more attractive.
    Reinforced Cuffs
    Helps sleeves stay in place and maintain shape.

    Care Instructions

    • Machine wash: Cold (max 30C or 90F)
    • Tumble dry: Low heat
    • Do not iron; Do not dryclean
    • Bleach as needed (non-chlorine)

    Origin & Compliance

    • Made in Nicaragua
    • Meets safety requirements (flammability, lead, etc.)
    • Embroidery & DTG printing friendly
    Product Details: Unisex Jersey Tank Top

    About The Product

    This must-have unisex jersey tank top fits like a well-loved favorite. High quality print makes it an ultimate statement shirt for years to come. This item has side seams to provide structural support. All bindings are the same fabric as the rest of the tank. Depending on the color, cotton, polyester, or rayon can appear.

    Key Features

    With Side Seams
    Located along the sides, they help hold the garment’s shape longer and give structural support.
    Self Fabric Binding
    Bindings are made from the same fabric as the body of the garment for a polished look.
    Fiber Composition
    Solid colors: 100% Cotton. Heathers: 52/48 blend. Tri-blends: 50% Poly, 25% Cotton, 25% Rayon.
    Safety & Compliance
    Meets flammability requirements. Safe for adults.
    Care Instructions

    • Machine wash: Warm (max 40C or 105F)
    • Tumble dry: Medium heat
    • Iron, steam or dry: Medium heat
    • Do not dryclean
    Origin

    • Made in Nicaragua
    • Adult Sizing
    • High quality print surface
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    Email us: support@shirtifygo.com

    Phone: +84 962 353 685

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