Size guide
| T-SHIRT UNISEX HEAVY COTTON TEE | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Measurements | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL |
| Width, in | 18.00 | 20.00 | 22.00 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 28.00 |
| Length, in | 28.00 | 29.00 | 30.00 | 31.00 | 32.00 | 33.00 |
| Sleeve length | 15.10 | 16.50 | 18.00 | 19.50 | 21.00 | 22.40 |
| Tolerance | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |
| UNISEX HOODIE | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Measurements | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL |
| Width, in | 20.08 | 22.05 | 24.02 | 25.98 | 27.99 | 29.92 |
| Length, in | 27.17 | 27.95 | 29.13 | 29.92 | 31.10 | 31.89 |
| Sleeve length | 33.50 | 34.50 | 35.50 | 36.50 | 37.50 | 38.50 |
| Tolerance | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |
| UNISEX CREWNECK SWEATSHIRT | ||||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Measurements | S | M | L | XL | 2XL | 3XL |
| Width, in | 20.00 | 22.01 | 24.00 | 26.00 | 28.00 | 30.00 |
| Length, in | 27.00 | 28.00 | 29.00 | 30.00 | 31.00 | 32.00 |
| Sleeve length | 33.50 | 34.50 | 35.50 | 36.50 | 37.50 | 38.50 |
| Tolerance | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 | 1.50 |
| UNISEX JERSEY TANK TOP | |||||
|---|---|---|---|---|---|
| Measurements | S | M | L | XL | 2XL |
| Width, in | 18.23 | 20.24 | 22.24 | 24.25 | 26.22 |
| Length, in | 26.97 | 27.99 | 28.98 | 30.00 | 30.98 |
| Arm opening | 10.12 | 10.75 | 11.63 | 12.50 | 13.37 |
| Tolerance | 1.00 | 1.00 | 1.00 | 1.00 | 1.00 |
Embrace the Art of Moving Slowly with Our Relatable Retro Mailer Tee

In a world that demands instant gratification and overnight shipping, the Postal Sloth Ill Get There When I Get There Retro Distressed T-Shirt Funny Tee stands as a bold, hilarious manifesto for the unhurried soul. This design isn’t just about a slow-moving creature; it captures a specific cultural zeitgeist—the collective desire to opt out of the high-pressure hustle and embrace a more deliberate pace of life. The irony of a sloth working in the postal service is a stroke of comedic genius that resonates with anyone who has ever felt the weight of a deadline or the frustration of a “pending” tracking number. It’s a satirical nod to the bureaucratic crawl we all experience, wrapped in a vibe of pure, unbothered confidence. When you wear this Postal Sloth Ill Get There When I Get There Retro Distressed T-Shirt Funny Tee, you aren’t just wearing a garment; you’re making a statement that your peace of mind is more important than the world’s frantic schedule.
Beyond the witty social commentary, this tee is engineered for maximum relaxation. We believe that a shirt about taking it easy should be the most comfortable thing in your wardrobe. Crafted from a premium cotton and soft blend, the fabric feels like a well-loved favorite from the very first wear. The material is breathable and lightweight, ensuring that you stay cool whether you are actually out delivering a message or simply lounging on the sofa. By avoiding harsh synthetic fibers and focusing on high-quality natural textures, we’ve created a piece that holds its shape through countless washes while maintaining that signature vintage softness. The distressed finish adds an extra layer of character, giving it the look of a cherished thrift store find that has stood the test of time, much like the timeless humor it represents.
Why This Design Rocks:
- Relatable Humor for the Modern Age: This design perfectly captures the “mood” of anyone who values their own timeline over external pressure, making it a conversation starter that guarantees a laugh.
- Vintage-Inspired Apparel Aesthetics: The distressed, weathered look provides an authentic retro feel that fits seamlessly into contemporary vintage-inspired apparel trends.
- Unique Gift for Mail Carriers: Looking for a lighthearted way to celebrate a post office worker or delivery driver? This serves as a fantastic, tongue-in-cheek tribute to the heroes of the mail route.
- Versatile Streetwear Vibe: With its classic cut and ironic messaging, it bridges the gap between casual loungewear and trendy, expressive streetwear.
Styling Tips:
The beauty of this retro-themed tee lies in its incredible versatility. To lean into the vintage-inspired aesthetic, pair it with a set of light-wash distressed denim jeans and your favorite beat-up high-top sneakers. If you’re heading out on a chilly day, layer it under an unbuttoned flannel shirt or a rugged canvas jacket to maintain that effortless, “just threw this on” look. For a more modern streetwear approach, tuck it into some high-waisted chinos and add a beanie. Because the humor is the focal point, keep your accessories minimal—let the sloth’s “unbothered” energy do all the heavy lifting for your outfit. It’s the perfect choice for weekend farmers’ markets, casual coffee dates, or simply as the ultimate “work from home” uniform.
Ultimately, the Postal Sloth Ill Get There When I Get There Retro Distressed T-Shirt Funny Tee is a celebration of character and comedic timing. It serves as a gentle reminder to breathe, slow down, and find the humor in the delays of life. Whether you are buying it for yourself or as a thoughtful gift for someone who appreciates dry wit and classic styling, this shirt is bound to become a staple. Don’t rush into your next fashion choice; choose the garment that understands the value of taking your time. Add the Postal Sloth Ill Get There When I Get There Retro Distressed T-Shirt Funny Tee to your collection today and let the world know that you’ll arrive exactly when you’re meant to—and not a second sooner.
About The Product
About The Product
The Gildan 5000 heavy cotton tee is a dependable classic made for everyday wear and custom printing. Its 100% cotton fabric is tightly knit to give designs sharper detail and long-lasting color. The seamless body eliminates side seams for a smoother fit.
Key Features
Stabilizes back seams to prevent stretching.
Tubular knit reduces fabric waste & looks better.
Highly elastic collar retains shape without seams.
Solid colors: 100% Cotton. Heathers: Poly blends.
Care Instructions
- Machine wash: Cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Tumble dry: Low heat
- Do not iron; Do not dryclean
Origin & Safety
- Made in Nicaragua
- Meets US/EU safety standards
- Unisex Sizing (Adult)
About The Product
The Gildan Heavy Blend™ hoodie, made from a soft cotton-poly blend, provides warmth and durability. Its unisex fit offers everyday versatility, with ribbed cuffs and hem to keep the shape intact. A large front pocket adds convenience, while the double-lined hood with matching drawcord gives it a clean, cohesive look. Trusted for custom printing and casual wear.
Key Features
Strong, smooth fabric perfect for printing. Heather Sport colors are 40/60 blend.
Adjustable double-lined hood with self-colored woven cord.
Kangaroo pouch pocket always keeps your hands warm.
Knitted in one piece using tubular knit, reducing fabric waste.
Care Instructions
- Machine wash: Cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Tumble dry: Medium heat
- Iron, steam or dry: Low heat
- Do not dryclean
Origin & Compliance
- Made in Bangladesh
- Meets safety requirements (flammability, lead, etc.)
- High quality DTG & DTF printing methods
About The Product
The Gildan 18000 sweatshirt is a unisex heavy blend crewneck made from a 50/50 cotton-polyester fabric, combining softness with lasting durability. Its smooth surface supports crisp, vibrant prints. The ribbed-knit collar and reinforced cuffs help it keep its shape over time. A seamless body design reduces irritation and adds to overall comfort.
– The White color variant may appear off-white due to fabric properties.
– Subtle orange hue shifts with lighting in the Orange color variant.
Key Features
Heavy blend fabric combines softness with durability.
Highly elastic collar helps retain shape, with seam.
Tubular knit reduces fabric waste & makes garment more attractive.
Helps sleeves stay in place and maintain shape.
Care Instructions
- Machine wash: Cold (max 30C or 90F)
- Tumble dry: Low heat
- Do not iron; Do not dryclean
- Bleach as needed (non-chlorine)
Origin & Compliance
- Made in Nicaragua
- Meets safety requirements (flammability, lead, etc.)
- Embroidery & DTG printing friendly
About The Product
This must-have unisex jersey tank top fits like a well-loved favorite. High quality print makes it an ultimate statement shirt for years to come. This item has side seams to provide structural support. All bindings are the same fabric as the rest of the tank. Depending on the color, cotton, polyester, or rayon can appear.
Key Features
Located along the sides, they help hold the garment’s shape longer and give structural support.
Bindings are made from the same fabric as the body of the garment for a polished look.
Solid colors: 100% Cotton. Heathers: 52/48 blend. Tri-blends: 50% Poly, 25% Cotton, 25% Rayon.
Meets flammability requirements. Safe for adults.
- Machine wash: Warm (max 40C or 105F)
- Tumble dry: Medium heat
- Iron, steam or dry: Medium heat
- Do not dryclean
- Made in Nicaragua
- Adult Sizing
- High quality print surface

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